I don’t get it
I don’t get it, think maybe I really am doing it wrong.
The Numbers Game. The Site that Shant Be Named (nor included on a resume!); not because my ‘social credit score’ plummeted – as I expected what with the vacay and Great Algorithm Blasphemy of 2011. And no this isn’t just another rant, I just think Klout (said it) is the social media equivalent of the BCS. (Geaux Tigers!)
- I see snooozzzfest posts get 100s of brainless RTs, but a handful of comments and zero trackbacks doesn’t speak ‘clout’ to me. I see crap lists of quotes, factoids and stats get reblogged and lauded across the webs by that tiny group who cares, while better fare sits undiscovered and sans ‘influence.’
- I cling to the idea that my personal influence or lack thereof isn’t relevant or really, online. And my self-hosted business blog should be part of the equation.
- I can truly engage – perhaps even influence others – until the cows come home, buy property, open an emporium of caffeinated beverages and overpriced baked goods, but that truly can’t be tracked, scored by some automated formula.
Cult of Personalities. Really? Celebrities, sports stars, a TV show I can see how fandoms develop; been there, done that, have the secret profiles to prove it. In the business world, we all have our gurus and favorite leaders.
But when it turns fanatical? You ‘like’ this team, that show, just so you can mock fans, troll review posts to sling insults like the anonymous dickwad you are, all because they dare like whatever or whomever you don’t. That, I don’t get.
“The social media in-crowd sometimes acted like a collection of Mean Girls. The real world didn’t notice or care.” – Forbes, on Social Media Lessons
See also when a smart blogger dares to challenge a ‘social media guru’ or marketing legend; hell hath no fury like fandoms irked when the wisdom of their ‘rock star’ is questioned. And FWIW I really ain’t sure if the ‘star’ status is anything more than a touch of echo chamber celebrity, cloaked in popularity, masked in a bestseller’s book jacket and next week’s speaking gig.
Paint by the Numbers, Social Media style. Someone said you should ‘do’ social media, so you bought the kit, the formula for what success should look like. You blog on schedule, create ‘content’ to drive traffic, have the obligatory Facebook page and are Twittering tweets. But it’s nothing more than token effort for appearances:
- You barely engage anywhere – even your own blog.
- Your company’s Facebook page is where crickets go to comment.
- Your Twitter feed is a ‘Look at Me’ personal branding broadcast channel.
Frustration. That is something I get as I look back on 2011. I hit some goals, missed others (another post). I tried different curators, sources and searches, found more sameness. I ventured away from familiar waters looking for those biting fish.. and met mostly other fishermen and women.
Not walking away from social media or blogging anytime soon – too in love with the sound of my own typing for that. I don’t get what I’m doing wrong, except spending to much time ‘talking’ and not enough ‘doing’ – guess some changes are a comin’ for 2012.
Enough navel gazing. Your turn, go:
Is your business marketing-proof?
Apple is not “Apple” anymore.
Let that sink in for a second.
One of the most successful brands in the world (allegedly) isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. They report earnings that stretch from here to Saturn and back – with stops at Starbucks, bathroom breaks and day trips to the galaxy’s biggest ball of yarn – yet they fall short of expectations.
You are not Apple
It’s my reply to a ton of would-be FAQs. You dream of ‘failing’ so well. No brand is infallible, above reproach or the slings and arrows of a tough economy or negative customer feedback. And yet, some businesses seem to be.
Netflix. Before they flip flopped on Quikster, they got a lot of crap by alienating customers and investors with confusing strategy and bad PR. Yes they lost subscribers, but 1) it wasn’t as mass an exodus as the hype made it seem and 2) they stood to make more money in the long run.
Dry Cleaners. Liquor Stores. Restaurants. One of my local cleaners is crap, but they have the location so it doesn’t matter. One of my favorite wine stores is on a busy corner, doing fine without even a website to pimp their libations.
- Friend: “Grr…this place always messes up my order, takes too long, whah whine gripe.”
- You: “Then why do you keep coming here?”
- Friend: “It’s close/convenient/cheap.”
Uverse. See also, almost any utility that provides phone or cable or power. The service they provide might be nice, but when they don’t work, their so-called support is an insult to customer disservice abominations.
What does it take to be marketing proof?
- You’re made of Teflon. No amount of bad press, angry tweets or ranty Facebook posts seem to stick. Angry customers don’t scare you, even if they talk more.
- What down economy? You and your ‘too big to fail’ banker are laughing together, as you’re raking in the cash no matter what.
- Is that a problem? No ‘PR crisis‘ – real or imagined – lasts in stakeholders memories more than a nanosecond.
- You’re the only game in town. You’re where customer service goes to die, be reanimated via some hoo doo rituals, tortured then killed again. But there are no alternatives, no Pepsi to your Coke.
- You’re oxygen. You sell toilet paper, food, gas, utilities – the stuff everyone HAS to have; customers are a given.
- You’ve cornered location. “No one beyond a 30-mile radius probably knows [you] exist, and [you're] happy that way,” says Shakirah Dawud on web-proof SMBs who can ignore Yelp and Google.
- You’re the BIG BOX BRAND. Everyone will assume bigger is better, even if it’s not. You might lose one customer with your terrible customer service – and they may tell all their friends – but there’s plenty more where they came from.
No matter what you do or don’t, what’s said or not, your phone is always ringing, your website always clicking, a line of paying customers waiting outside your door. Is this your business? I probably doubt it.
Thoughts on a marketing-proof business, real or mythical?
You’re doing it wrong
“There is no right or wrong way in social media.”
Every so often I see it. I hear it. And my eyeballs roll back in my head, I drink of the wine and sigh.
Madness. Poppycock. Piffle.
- If there was no wrong, there would be no posts about the pitballs of crappy corporate blogging and funny lists of why we don’t follow lame social media gurus. *
- There wouldn’t be an ocean hot water for folks to parboil Kenneth Cole, Groupon, Nestle and a host of others.
- If there was no wrong way, none of us would have jobs. (Maybe I could tweet for Ashton Kutcher, since he’s now doing it wrong – the other way.)
- If there were no bad examples or excellent case studies of the right ways, a lot of gurus, pundits and other leaders wouldn’t be able to sell some books.
Puh-lease. I think some of my bestest, more funnier posts have been rants on the crap people are doing wrong.
It’s me.
I’ll sing you a chorus of “TEHO and we all have different goals, reasons, ambitions for being social.” Fine, whatever moves your furniture. But there are limits, there are many wrongs, including:
- Stealing other peoples work, copying blog posts.
- Taking credit for what’s not yours, i.e. retweeting without attribution.
- Spam link bait crap sucks and I still believe Auto-DMs are of the Devil.
- IMO small businesses need websites, but will grant there are exceptions. It’s wrong to say you must “do” social, have a Facebook page, Twitter or a blog. “Too boring to blog” is b.s., but of course there’s no shortage of poorly written, dull content out there.
FWIW you can flout conventional wisdom and break the Twitter rules, yet still achieve success. But when I see your company’s tweet stream is nothing but “we sell widgets, come see our widgets, which are totally for sale” tweets, then – unless you can come back at me with proof positive of your profitable sales - that’s the wrong way to do it.
If I were to write “my passions,” whatever I wanted – say, make every other blog post a Vampire Diaries recap – I’m sure many would say wrong strategy, bad move for my professional goals. And they’d be right. Unless of course, I was seeking to abandon PR and become a TV critic.
What’s right for me may not be wrong for you. Or something like that. Feel free to tell me I’m wrong.
*ETA: I really thought this list was good, funny; not calling the writer lame or guru. Apologies.
If it’s too loud, I’m too old
Background music is supposed to be that, in the background. But everyone who wants to ‘entertain’ me – ball games, restaurants, cruises, etc. – blares it too loud for my taste.
Guess I am old
I’ve hit the point when I watch games on mute because the sounds of the stadium are too loud. I can’t hear the commentary or really follow the game. You’d think TV producers would learn to turn down the ‘ambient’ background mics when their pundits are blathering.
I just kinda hate ‘noise.’
I turn down the TV during action moments when the sound effects for punches, explosions, car crashes are at eardrum bursting levels. (Then there’s the dialogue I can barely hear and I’m tempted to turn on the closed captioning.)
The “Serenity” deck on the lovely Carnival Dream was anything but. Designed to be outside the spa, alas it is also adjacent to the open lido deck pool and water park. Science lesson: sound travels, even over ‘noise-reducing’ earbuds. This adult only retreat is better on older refurbed ships, where it’s more isolated. And I can hear my music – or nothing except the water and the slurping of my frosty beverage.
WTH does this have to do with marketing or PR?
Many business are too noisy with their marketing and sloppy social media: endless tweet streams, Facebook alerts that never shut up; sinful public relations that hypes the wrong messages or sends off-target pitches shotgun-style; emails polluting our inboxes with spam; and my personal peeve, automated sound or music when I get to the website.
It’s noise pretending to be of value, faking it as ‘content.’
Would you notice if the marketing volume was turned down? Would it make a difference?
Social Media: Wave of the Now?
There are lots of books and about a triagazillion blog posts on the subject of social media, hyping its ‘revolutionary’ and ‘immediate’ aspects as they call for the death of Web 2.0 or the beginning of PR 3.4 or the latest end all to be all, until next week when we change. Again.
A conversation
John Falchetto and I once chatted about how businesses want social media results right the hell now already, they aren’t in it for the long haul. See also many a post on various get rich, easy diet, free marketing bullshit.
“Dichotomy: Real work takes time vs. the instant gratification, results and ROI we seek.”
That was my comment as Neicole Crepeau and I started talking about the dueling dichotomies in social media. It got me thinking about my would-be clever category for social media.
It’s not about the NOW.
Social media, with its viral and real timey-ness, is about how the now can impact or influence the future.
This is why I was curious about the benefit of sharing old posts, the value of timely vs. lasting content (h/t to Michael Schechter for that quip in a comment about content marketing) and wonder if this post has been in blog drafts too long.
It’s about developing the relationships that not only add to your bottom line today but also building relationships with customers who’ll be loyal to the brand for years to come. It’s about a company listening, paying attention, stepping up in real-time – because fake-time blows – and winning the loyalty of new customers.
Social media is a game changer: the way business is done, how we stay in touch with friends; it’s our new water cooler, it’s making TV the background for our digital lives, with social mentions possibly defining what makes a hit TV show. Plenty of evidence suggest the future of social media continuing to go mobile, via the explosive growth of mobile devices coupled with network integration.
How are businesses looking ahead to the future? As companies pour big money into Facebook and Twitter campaigns, build branded iPad apps and try to predict what Google+ will do for business, foresight becomes key.
It’s about time.
Time. Looking ahead, knowing when – and when NOT – to jump on the next NOW wave will be a smart part of any social strategy, as will looking back to look at what is and isn’t working (hello, ROI). Time. Taking moments to get to know each other as people, not just faces behind the tweets. Time. Listening, spending time paying attention to your customers, to learn what they want and need, how you can help them now. And in the future.
Is social media the wave of the now? Thoughts, quips, NSFW limericks.. do share.