Vagina Marketing
Warning: this rant was inspired by my friend Jenn Whinnem and some bullshit I’ve read and seen in the last couple weeks. If my ‘feminist politics’ get your boxers, briefs, thongs or granny panties in a twist, feel free to bounce rate out of here.
Vagina Marketing
How does one go about marketing the vagina? That was my question to Jenn, along with the ‘joke’ that it’s illegal to do so save Nevada. See this is about the marketing of the word vagina.
Words change meaning. In Kate and Leopold Liev Schriber couldn’t stop laughing at how commonplace the word Erection was used back in old timey, sephia-toned days for something other selling boners to middle aged men.
Words have connotations. There’s the riddle designed to show gender bias, about the doctor who’s Dun Dun DUN! also a Mother, the kind that’s a woman. With ovaries.
The brain trust at Summer’s Eve is at again, because their last round of douchey stupidity wasn’t dumb enough. The meme of their latest blight on marketing:
Vaginas are awesome!
Look people, stop squirming. You wouldn’t be here without a vagina, unless you’re a clone, were hatched in a lab or are possibly an alien. It’s a word, a part of the anatomy. I’m more squeaked out by the word bowels, so let’s pretend to not be 12 years old or Butthead’s 2nd cousin, thrice removed. Ahem.
They have cast a Cat on a Mission, a CAT PUPPET as spokesperson for this ‘viral’ atrocity. Bad tongue in cheek meta puns, OMG.
SpokesKITTY Carlton is supposed to make the WORD Vaginal synonymous with Awesome. The point is “to get women talking about their bodies in an open way,” according to their press release. And this shit will somehow help them sell crap.
Western civilization is doomed
Time capsule: Jersey Shore, Viagra, E-Harmony, KY ‘for women’, overpriced cars, junk food, no-effort diets, teeth whitening. We’re apparently the most vapid, narcissistic, selfish little trolls and sadly much of this crap is being ‘marketed’ to and/or ‘for’ women. Piffle.
Thinking about Cialis, Viagra ads, all ripe for the mocking – thank YouTube. They’ll use terms like ‘ED’ or ‘erectile disfunction’ but don’t dare use the words penis, flacid, limp, impotent, soft or anything else that might dare suggest the lack of a man reaction is anything other than a serious medical problem. Guess you don’t make money making dudes feel crappy about themselves, worrying about penile freshness? IDK.
Women on the other hand, it’s some inferiority on their parts – which marketers exploit to sell them crap – if they can’t pass the freshness test or experience that pleasure moment. See also, KY and its Intense ‘for women’ ads that are in fact, also very much about and for men.
Summer’s Eve has decided that the way to remove the ‘stigma’ of the word vagina – quoting from their press release – is to invent “a fun way to give it a new, positive place in today’s vernacular.”
Because the word vagina itself is so offensively negative?! I get what they wanted to do, but think this is pretty much a dumb, offensive way to go about doing it. That or I just don’t get their brand of funny.
The part I skipped
Same week I saw this: the courts decided that violence towards women was cool to sell to kids, provided the scantily-clad women covered their naughiest of digitally-enhanced, jiggling NIPPLE and VAGINA bits. Yes, I am over simplifying. I’m also skipping another 1,200 word diatribe on cultural values and who is responsible when a child of 12 buys a ‘game’ in which the object is to shoot, kill, curse, steal, fight and/or abuse women.
Instead, I’ll ask the marketers “to women for women” WTH my version of a game would be like, if it will be totally Vaginal and when can I expect it to hit shelves? Oh if I score points by buying shoes, you’re all fired. Blah blah tell me what you think blah.
Think Global, Pitch Local Atlanta
Public Relations delivers great value for business, whether it’s managing a crisis or building stronger relationships. For a small business that cannot afford expensive advertising and promotional campaigns, public relations–smart PR, that is–can make a big difference.
Thanks to the PRSA Georgia Independent Counselors Forum and Mitch Leff, my fellow solo PR and I got the inside scoop on how to pitch local papers via last week’s great panel and “speed dating” sessions.
Not everyone in Atlanta is getting the print news from the Atlanta Journal Constitution. 
The metro Atlanta area is a big sprawling web of more than two dozen counties, with most of its residents living and/or working in the ‘burbs. The editors and publishers on the panel agreed that their readers are interested in local news that directly impacts their communities.
While the big name media outlets may be the bigger ego stroke, the fact is your potential customers often do their shopping locally. That means smaller, local newspapers may be the place to pitch.
- Ray Appen, Publisher, Appen papers (Revue & News, Forsyth Herald, Johns Creek Herald, Milton Herald) looks at search data. Visitors are coming from Google and search engines and they work to offer news that makes NorthFulton.com the place for readers to find what they need. Tip: It’s about the link love for you and your local small business.
- Brian Clark, Managing Editor, Neighbor Newspapers (many of the metro suburbs and neighborhoods). Local news is about the people, so the information and the pictures are what make the stories connect with the readers. Tips: You have about 10 seconds to impress, whether it’s the writer, the editor or the reader. Following up is good, stalking is not.
- John Schaffner, Editor, Reporter Newspapers (Brookhaven, Buckhead, Sandy Springs) biweekly papers offering neighborhood news on people, events and businesses specific to these areas. Tip: Know the publication and audience you’re pitching. If it does not relate directly to the local area, don’t pitch it.
- Kirsten Palladino, Life and Food Editor, The Sunday Paper, a weekly paper that covers local news, travel, arts and entertainment including the local theatre and music scenes. Tip: They are delivering news with their own unique perspective and creative voice, so don’t give them the same pitch you give everyone else.
- Tripp Liles, Publisher/Owner of the Roswell Current. The paper’s focus is also people, events, businesses that impact its readers–mostly female–in Roswell and the surrounding cities like Sandy Springs. Tip: Plan ahead and submit information in a timely manner.
Are you where your customers are? While discussing the growing number of media outlets, emerging new and social media–and how that impacts small businesses, advertisers, and readers–Ray Appen quoted Herbert Simon:
“A wealth of information creates a poverty of attention.”
While many of us consume news from Google and mass media, local media gets your customers’ attention because it hits them where they live. Shouldn’t your PR and marketing do the same?
Public Relations, Social Media, Marketing: Get the Picture
A picture is worth a thousand words, right? As part of a digital pressroom or website or simple brochure, copy and message are important, but often what gets noticed and remembered most are the images.
Corporate Photography, Haigwood Studios
Is Quality Stock?
Value-based stock houses like Shutterstock and iStock are nice, perfect for small and local businesses. They sell low, medium and high-resolution royalty-free images at low prices. I’ve recommended and used these for many of my Atlanta small business clients. If a generic house or car or hotel room is all you need, no need to shoot your own image.
Is your brand okay with generic images that anyone–including your competition–could use? What about your product? If you have a unique or custom product, or are showcasing your brand’s talent, design, installation, and craftsmanship, you need your own images.
The Pros Know
That is when you bring out a professional, who brings to the table staging, composition, skill, much better equipment and most importantly, a better eye for what works, what sells.
“I may have the same racket as Roger Federer, but I can’t play like he can,” says John Haigwood of Haigwood Studios. The equipment matters, but the talent matters more.
John says he can do more with the same point and shoot camera that we use because he understands lighting and angles, composition and concept better to make those pictures stand out from the rest.
There is a difference between print and web graphics.
- PRINT (publishable) resolution. Most magazines, printers and service bureaus define print resolution as 300 or 350 DPI (dots per inch). That means the image was taken with a camera that has at least 7-8 megapixels.
- WEB (screen) resolution. It is 72 DPI, files optimized for viewing on the screen.
- Photoshop cannot add resolution or pixels. It cannot resize a tiny picture to a clean 8 by 10. Images pulled off most websites will not print cleanly. Legalities aside, standard web images do not have print resolution. Period.
- Photoshop can resample an image (rearrange the pixels) to get the DPI to 300, if the file is big enough. This means that the picture you snapped with your iPhone is pretty much as good as it gets; and while it’s fine for web or YouTube videos, it is not something you’d print in a brochure or magazine.
“I hardly use Photoshop,” says John Haigwood. “Almost everything you see in my portfolio was done in the studio with the camera, lenses, lighting.” He adds that tools like Photoshop are great for photographers and designers but have become a crutch for some in the industry.
Telling the Story
Telling a great story, in advertising, public relations or social media, often comes down to the picture. It wasn’t just reports of the Hudson River crash, but the pictures and videos shared in real time via Twitter and social media made the story explode.
Many online newsrooms make high and low-resolution images and videos ready for media download. And the right picture can make difference between an interesting article that gets a little PR coverage, and a story “going viral” that reshapes a brand’s image. I’ve gotten clients numerous media placements in key publications, and the professionally shot images were a big part of that.
While not a picture, a great chart or infographic is one of the best ways to communicate a lot of information in a small, easy-to-read space. I for one loves me some ChartPorn.
Devil’s in the Details. Get the Picture?
Stick a Fork in It: Five Dead Public Relations Tactics
This month’s PRSA Independent Counselors meeting on Dead Public Relations Tactics provided great insights coupled with funny stories from panel speakers, including: Connie Bryant, Newell Rubbermaid; Nancy Rogers, BOLDface Communications, Green Earth PR Network; Chris Schroder, Schroder PR; and moderator: Ed Van Herik, Independent Counselor. So Five PR tactics deemed dead, or near dead:
(Paper. Paper is so out, paper actually takes numbers 1, 2 and 3!)
- Press Releases. While the press release itself is not dead (?), a printed-on-letterhead press release sent via mail or fax is certainly not necessary today. (Hint: rhymes with e-mail.)
- Press Kits. Big money used to be spent packaging stories in pretty folders with series of four-color brochures, letterhead-printed fact sheets, business cards, etc. Big waste of money now. Reporters don’t have filing cabinets; today they work on laptops.
- Some clients still insist on mass distributing press releases and press kits, in spite of assurances from their hired experts that journalists do not read them (and if you emailed it, you run the risk of getting blocked for being a spammer).
- A fancy kit or picture may catch a reporter’s eye, which means wow, you might get them on the phone. But if they’re interested, you have to resend the materials because they “filed” it right away.
- And yes, after we pitch and call and get the reporter on the phone and interested in the news/story, they ask for…wait for it…a press release. Sigh.
- Faxes. See number 1. If it is paper, it’s not being read.
- Newsrooms sometimes turn off the fax machines. If it’s breaking news, it cannot sit in a pile of paper until someone reads it.
Exception: Paper can be the cut through, that thing that stands out–for the right outlet, pitch and client. Obviously not anything breaking, but PAPER could cut through the electronic din of emails, tweets, RSS feeds for the right story or event.
….
- Newsrooms sometimes turn off the fax machines. If it’s breaking news, it cannot sit in a pile of paper until someone reads it.
- Press Conferences. Breaking, hard news gets press conference coverage, and that is not usually for a “good” story. Press conferences cover politics, crises, major stories impacting national or regional audiences, or other urgent news. Like Balloon Boy or annoying reality TV people.
- Trade shows. Connections are down, fewer media outlets are going, and they send fewer reporters. They have their place for some marketing programs, but trade shows aren’t what they once were.
Exception: Product Demonstrations. Rather than a boring press conference or trade show release, a smart engaging product demonstration can be a good way to present a new product or service to a group of reporters. Bonus if you can pull together multiple brands within your industry and offer a joint demonstration where reporters can get more information for their time invested.
So check yourself PR pro. As professionals, it’s our job to keep current and understand how media audiences respond to our tactics and adjust those tactics for best responses. If you’re still sending out faxes, printing and sending pricey media kits, hosting press conferences for every news announcement, consider this a permission slip to stop it. You’re in danger of getting a headstone in the PR graveyard.
What would you add to Dead PR Tactics?
This was a joint blog post by Davina K. Brewer, with some great suggestions from Jenny Schmitt. Up next, Better PR Tactics for Today’s Media.